Praising God

     On the 28th of this month it will have been one month since our miscarriage. It hasn't been an easy month by any means, but it is getting a little easier though. I guess eventually you have to move on somewhat, that's not to say that we are going to forget that we had been pregnant, but we can't live in the past. We have to praise God and live in the present. But honestly there are days when I don't want to praise God, I'll ask over and over, why did he have to take our baby? But who am I to ask God why?

     Some people may not know it, but my wife has Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, long name that basically means that it's hard for us to get pregnant. But we prayed and prayed that we get pregnant. After a few months of continuous prayer God answered our prayers. Of course we had the miscarriage, but God answered our prayers. We were so afraid that we would never get pregnant, but we did, thanks be to God. Doctors had told Paula that more than likely she would never get pregnant, but apparently God had other plans. When we were in the ER we both realized that God had answered our prayers, but also that He had different plans than we did. Perhaps this was his way of saying that it's not our time to have a baby, I don't know. But I'm thankful that He knows.

     There are many nights at home that are spent with tears in our eyes. Some nights are better than others. But it still hurts. We still try our best to praise God, but its really hard sometimes when you think about what was taken away. But I thank God for my wife, she is the greatest gift from Him other than Jesus. I also thank Him for all our family, related and not, they are all our family.